Let's start with the funniest change of them all Inshaa Allah. That would be the fact that I now count my kids instead of immediately knowing them by name. LOL! I mean, yes of course I call them by name when I need to get their attention, but when I'm in public or in a situation where I need twelve eyes, I would always be thinking silently "One, two, Three, Four...okay everyone's here...no one's missing! Yay!"
Another, not so funny, change is the inescapable fact that I will probably be washing, drying and folding clothes till the end of time! LOLz:p Really, the clothes never ends!!! And newborns, well they carry the most dirty laundry!!! Lolz:p
Having three kids before was easier only in terms of giving each child individual attention. It was easier to navigate between three to ensure that all their needs were met psychologically and emotionally. But with four it's a whole other ball game. It is absolutely crucial now that both my husband and myself set aside time every day where each child has that special 'mummy time' and 'daddy time'. This is very important and it is because after four kids you now have older 'children' and not just older 'toddlers and everyone knows that newborns require a lot of attention, so it is essential that you make sure the older kids don't, for even a second, feel neglected or ignored in anyway. A great way to do this is to involve them very much with the daily 'baby tasks'. Make them feel needed and useful! Children like feeling important as it give them confidence and a sense of purpose. With help of course, you can let them each take turns holding the baby and cuddling your newborn. This give them a very 'hands-on' feeling of the fact that they are all now 'Big Brothers'.
As for the 'marriage' aspect and how four kiddies have affected us as a couple. I have A LOT to say about this one!!! The hubby and I are now more in love than ever before. Something has changed....but for the better, Alhamdulillah! I can't really explain it...it's like a new found respect and appreciation for one another and the roles we play in each other's lives...a kind of newly found maturity...I mean we still harass, tease and annoy the living daylights out of each other sometimes...me with my untameable sarcasm and him with his goofy "huh?? What did I do?" attitude which just sends me nuts! But still...it's different now...
This might sound silly to say out loud, seeing that I'm 26 six years old with four kids and eight years of marriage, but I now finally feel like a 'grown-up'! I no longer feel like a 'young lady' or a 'youth'...but it's a good feeling though Alhamdulillah! No mid-life crisis for me Inshaa Allah. I actually can't wait to get my first batch of grand kids! Lolz:p
Seriously though, I guess maybe because we went through so much in such a short space of time we can now see one another as mature functional adults rather than just newly wed inexperienced spouses. It gives this really beautiful feeling of appreciation and the air just feels so much lighter with this sweet little bundle of joy in our arms...
Thanks again readers for lending an ear and May Allah(swt) grant patience and joy to all of your growing families...Ameen!